TAMPA BAY RAYS the Movie

"If you wrote this story as a Hollywood script and took it to a producer they would say it's too unbelievable". A Dan Dierdorfism that I hate but...

As a member of the RAYS (anti-Boston) bandwagon I need this Story to play out and the Rays to win the World Series (or just the ALCS) and if they follow through after the game 5 Boston Comeback, I will start my screen-play but first to assemble the cast.


COACH MADDEN. The quirky, enigmatic manger, who gets the young RAYS to channel their
own passion and energy to discover something more within themselves (montage?), played by Gene Hackmen (with fo-hawk implant)



















The EMERGING STAR B.J. Upton. The young slugger with all the talent on the planet but a chip on his shoulder who battles with adversity during the season and then comes through for his team when it matters most, played by rapper turned actor T.I.


















The ROOKIE Evan Longoria. The new kid on the block that burst on to the scene to give everyone hope, his child-like innocence and enthusiasm changes the teams chemistry and his "I don't know about what happened in the past" speech rallies the team for a big comeback just when the chips are down. Played by Sean William Scott (that's right Stiffler)



















The POWER MAN Carlos Pena. The Clean-up hitter with a small speaking role, but through-out the course of the season has some pivotal hits and homeruns. Played by another Pena, Carlos Pena (Crash).















The Question Mark, Carl Crawford. Would he be ready for the post season, would the "devil" come back to haunt this Ray. A much needed piece to the Ray line-up emerges with a couple of huge performances in the playoffs and key base hits in the clincher. Played by Cuba Gooding Jr (baby possibly also cast for dramatic effect)




















PITCHING STAFF, in Baseball Movies they only show one pitcher for every game played, I don't see "Big Game" James Shields or The "Cat" Scott Kazmir as being a guy the audience will connect with so I propose bringing back Kurt "wild thing" Vaughn to play a combination of the two. Played by Charlie Sheen (we could get him cheap, and he would be the second Hanes commercial guy in the cast)




RAYS NEMESIS'S, The characters are the main people in the Rays way as they try to become the Hallmark Card, Lifetime movie of the week, worst to first, win one for the little guy, Champs.


Ozzie Guillen: Played by Himself, his part of the movie would be done via green screen editing, we would just use the most ridiculous quotes and rants from Guillen and cleverly place all of them into context of the Rays Divisional series win over the White Sox. It would be kinda like those Coors Light commercials (Playoffs?).




















Kevin Youkilis, a constant thorn in the RAYS side, played using CG provided by Lucas Arts Soda Piniski. Youkilis also took his batting stance from Soda.


















Dustin Pedroia, I got this casting hint from a line-up reading made by Jonathan Pappelbon a few years ago. Pedroia is played by ESPN's John Clayton


















Coco Crisp, the fight with James Shields, the game winning hit in comeback, such an integral part of the movie, I also took this moment to cast what's hot right now, and following suit with the current Hollywood trend. Playing Coco will be a Capri Sun drinking Chihuahua. This thing has just gotten ridiculous.




















GO RAYS, win game Seven make the story complete..put the BOSOX bandwagon out of it's misery. All rights to RAYS MOVIE and its casting is officially retained by the first round bust. Leave a comment.....